Sex Code

my name is Colby Keller and I’m 33 years
old and I’m probably best known as a
porn performer porn is an interesting
business and that the longer you do it
the less you actually get paid like you
know every year I get less and less
money not war buy less in most cases
that means half of what I got at one
particular company the rate that I’ve
had I’ve had since I started 10 years
ago like there’s no you don’t ever get
like a pay increase no standard of
living increase doesn’t happen it’s a
financial state of the porn industry
today I think does not affect my ability
to ask for for better wages but I don’t
I think that in the nature of the
business itself does not allow performer
to really even have that power at all I
mean I that that being said I have
exercised it with companies and before
some time I’ve once accidentally it’s a
very difficult business I don’t have an
agent you know I think it might be
different for people that have agents
because the agent takes on that role
I’ve been lucky enough to have a look
that’s changed where I can move from
company to company and now I have like a
personality that people want but you
know usually like you couldn’t do that
as a performer because one company
doesn’t want you to work with another
that’s their competitor and getting
enough work in that situation can be
difficult and a good reason for that is
because of the Freid not only this free
porn but there’s more porn so there’s
more competition porn is like any other
business I don’t know if I don’t really
know the state of the business like I
hear things from owners of companies I
tend to believe them but I don’t know
you know because it’s in their interest
not to pay me more money you know so
like is it really that promptly like I
see them they have a lot of money they
have really nice houses and cars like I
don’t know you know really financially
what kind of straights their game I can
only guess at it grew up in Texas and I
come from a pretty conservative my
mother is a conservative evangelical
Christian my father was not I guess you
could call more of like a Liberty
maybe I always thought of him as being
liberal I was always an artist and
always kind of positioned that way and
the family and artists have a particular
way of thinking which I think tends to
go in politically in that direction and
that really is about being empathetic
and trying to think in broader I mean it
can be also a very self-centered and
narcissistic career I guess you could
say but to really be an effective artist
you have to know other human beings I
would like to hope anyways the left’s
response to porn and sexuality I think
in general I mean there’s a long history
of the you know the historical left kind
of being very ascetic and sex-negative
and so there’s definitely that aspect of
I mean there’s a there’s a part of the
left it’s pleasure averse that you know
where we know revolutionary soldiers and
like that’s the objective and like you
know you everything that doesn’t pertain
to that you like you don’t even pay
attention to and I ultimately I think
that was the failing of those regimes
because they don’t give people that’s
what capitalism gives people is if not
pleasure the illusion of it you know the
promise of it and where did you know
these socialist States or communists you
know parties where was that what’s the
incentive to make you like continually
you know sacrifices the revolutionary
and those are the things that are kind
of missing from that that that
historical frame and I think that’s the
the thing the left needs to kind of
remember and think about how do you
organize foreign workers or sex workers
you don’t I mean I think it’s like a lot
of other service industry jobs or even
it’s I mean actually I think it closely
resembles the entertainment industry and
where there are unions porn performers
because you’re talking ultimately about
a group of workers who
tend to be young tend to come from not
always mind you but tend to come from
underprivileged backgrounds and don’t
have the information that that would you
know allow them to do that and
ultimately like there’s no ability to
put pressure on the industry my biggest
thing is I think health you know there
are a lot of performers you know the
straight world doesn’t use condoms the
gay world condom usage is you know
starting to kind of fall away
which obviously presents some health
challenges for those those performers
and while the gay companies that are
doing this you know talk a lot about
like the testing regimes that they put
their performers through like there are
things like Truvada which is a
medication that was approved by the fda
last year which is you know according to
the studies something like 98 99 %
effective more effective than condoms
actually and it’s a pill you take every
day I take it and you know I haven’t had
any adverse side effects I also go to my
doctor everything wants to get my blood
tested like you know so I think I feel
very secure in my my health with regards
to this medication and it protects
people and it would protect performers
and you know I don’t think it’s outside
the realm of reason to think about
putting all all performers you know on
the straight and the gay side of the
business on a health insurance plan that
would cover this medication and protect
people and while it seems very
reasonable I think would almost be an
impossibility and and for a lot of
different reasons but a big one is that
there would be a lot of resistance I
think from the industry and general to
that and because their their profit
margins I think are tighter because of
the internet and free porn and more
competition like or even less inclined
to think along those lines I do like the
idea of things being free and available
I think in some ways it’s just becomes
an obstacle that those companies need to
kind of work around to be able to find
ways to make it profitable for
themselves I support the idea of
technology making things
and free it’s difficult though because
it does hurt me does hurt people in the
industry what aspects of the work that I
do on my blog are part of my creative
practice and aren’t able for me in that
sense or get something more valuable
from it and how much of it is work and
by work that I think typically
translates its promotional activity I
try not to see the work that I do on my
blog as is promotional I feel like in
some ways if I think of it that way
the people reading it would see it that
way and I think we’re all averse to some
effect of that constant you know
promotional PR industry you know Twitter
and Instagram all these things are there
to promote these these products
commodities and people you know are
commodities so I don’t want to think of
it that way although I know it functions
in that way my blog I actually didn’t
start the blog that was my partner who
performs under the name Karl Marx
started the blog for me and it very much
was intentional on his part not only as
a promotional vehicle but I think he he
knew that I would probably enjoy it and
it would be good for me but I wasn’t
gonna do it myself
so he kind of had to pressure me into it
so he started the blog and what he would
do is that he would have me like oh you
should look at this post I did knowing
that I’m gonna want to like change it or
edit it hurt and which eventually would
happen I started to see like oh wow I
can do things with this that are fun and
interesting and it became I started to
begin I began to see it kind of as an
art project and that made it doable for
me which is what keeps me engaged with
it if it was just promotion like I
couldn’t stand to do it sometimes like
you know I wake up in the morning it’s
like I don’t want to write you know two
blog posts you know do I really want to
go on Instagram and like post this
shirtless selfie I don’t want to do that
and that very much feels like work and
there are parts of the blog like you
know I do like a boners for book so I do
this I see penis posting thing and
people love it and sometimes it’s like
you know do I really want to show
my dick on the vlog those posts can feel
really like I love it I love when people
send me books and it’s a great way to
communicate with fans and kind of
develop a relationship with people but
it really does feel like painful to sit
there and try to get a boner to like
take this photo you know with my and get
to push the button in time you know and
that very much feels like work even
though when I sit back and I look at the
end product you know I can appreciate
that it’s doing something maybe it can
it has the potential to go in a
direction that’s creatively more
fulfilling for me boners for books I
have to give full credit to a good
friend of mine named Dale Cooper who
came up with the idea and I’m like oh
that’s an amazing idea can I do it too
so I started doing it so people will
send me books and I’ll take a picture
with the boner with the book I’m an
artist and part of what I in kind of a
weird missionary zeal kind of a way is
you know I want to expose people to the
artists particularly contemporary
artists and what people are doing and
for people to see that art can be
engaging and fun and so a big part of it
you know blah and plus I like art books
I can’t afford them so it’s a good way
to get like beautiful art books you know
for the price of a boner
can I envision a utopian porn future
I can totally envision that I mean this
is the thing I think the left sometimes
forgets to do which is that we have to
remember this utopian legacy that that
is always there even we know I think but
the most conservative aspect of the left
in the United States would be a
Democratic Party it’s like well why
would you want universal health
insurance like they would just there’s
never like the answer of we think this
is a good thing that everyone get health
insurance and we are progressing towards
that objective there’s never this idea
of any longer that there’s a progressive
goal in mind because that essentially is
saying that there is a utopian idea
behind your political objectives they
want to deny that and pretend that it’s
just like they’re just being good you
know man
oh and that’s silly there’s always this
aspect of the left which is utopian and
and it’s my job I think in dealing in
the sex world to think about what that
space is and to try to live it because I
did I mean it’s it’s good to think in
the utopian sense but it’s also to see
those things where they exist now you
know I consider myself to be a communist
and I think one of the failings of
communism was to always put communism
into the future you know and as this
unreachable thing that’s in the future
that we’re striving for instead of
seeing it in the world today in ways
that those values manifest them what are
those values and how do they manifest
themselves now and thinking of ways to
stress the now like maybe there are
things we can do to bring it into being
now in small ways and you know for me
you know I was you know I had a
relationship with two different people
and there was an aspect of that that was
about you know trying to make bridges
beyond the kind of bourgeois concept of
love it’s about two people and and it’s
a very complicated thing that’s very
difficult but like imagining ways to
make that work and the ways where that
can be enriching for all those parties
you know I don’t think I succeeded at it
though it was the fact that I was
striving to do it that was I think I I
think was good for me and I hope was
good for those people that were involved
in it my partner now we have to get
there’s a lot of pressure on me to get
married right now because I won’t get
health insurance through his company
anymore because marriage is legal in the
state of New York who were domestic
partners so which I think I like that
type of arrangement better politically I
don’t like the idea of marriage so you
know now we have to get married for me
to keep getting health insurance and so
I feel like I’m being pressured into
this very conservative like relationship
you know there’s ultimately about
property and access to like health care
and it’s like do I want that to be what
my relationship is about is that the
reason you get married to someone it’s
reason a lot of people get married but
like I don’t think that’s a good so you
do i do what do I do
it’s tricky it’s really tricky what are
my plans for the future I mean that’s
when I get asked a lot I get a little
offended sometimes when people ask this
question because you know would you ask
a ballet dancer like you know well so
what are your plans for the future
usually it’s asked like this you said it
in a very positive way so like what are
your plans for the future like you can’t
do porn your whole life yeah and it’s
it’s almost to the to the effect of like
when are you gonna grow up and get a
real job that’s where I feel like the
question is I don’t feel like you asked
it that way
but I think the way to sustain myself
obviously like this is the one
profession that I know that I’ve made
the most income in I don’t see a
professional path forward where I’m
making money that does it in some way at
least address that part of my my past
that existed the current existence you
know I’ve always been an artist and it’s
been a challenge trying to figure out
how to you know I want to make work as
Colby Keller and how does Colby Keller
make work what’s a sustainable practice
for Colby Keller and what’s a practice
that addresses all of these different
concerns of mine not just kind of like
political ones but mine my history in
the porn industry so I’ve really started
to try to think about Colby as a medium
as an artistic medium which to go back
to your previous question I think is a
lot of is a problem a lot of people in
the creative industry face where does
the line stop between what’s work and
what’s not work and for me that line has
become much harder to distinguish and I
feel like everything I do is work and
everything I do is also not work and and
I have to accept this I’m much more I
think I’m much more willing to accept it
because of my art background knowing
that this is the way that the artist
kind of functions and it made me it
might be the only way that I can have a
practice as an artist with this history
as a form performer I don’t know there’s
definitely a component of
sex and sexuality that I feel like is
inherently kind of speaks to kind of a
leftist position and I’m definitely
drawn to the business for that reason
and part of that is about being opened
completely and like being literally
being naked in front of people and
showing like my desire kind of you know
for what it is and and how that is a
positive good thing and a human thing
and something that connects us with
other people I mean sex is one of those
things where like it really does show
you that as much as there that you know
kind of individualistic ideology that we
associate with the right and with
capitalism might seem logical like sex
is the thing that proves that it’s
really not because you do need other
people like physically you need to touch
other people you need to be with other
you know what I mean like there’s a need
that we have as an animal to to be with
others and I think it undermines that
that political position of the right I
think and it’s it’s through its through
kind of understanding that and exploring
that that we can kind of use that as a
metaphor I think so I definitely see a
component of what I do as a part of that
I know a lot of girls that don’t need
the money they have all the connections
they’ve gone so far in their career and
decided no you know what I like doing I
like having sex I like meeting people I
like almost the power trip of people
giving me money to do something that I’m
good at and that I enjoy
I’m peach / peachy depending on how you
speak – I’m a sex worker who lives in
Brisbane you can usually find my boobs
anywhere on the internet where you look
and probably was well known on website
called Scot girls which is softcore
website and on an escort site called
scarlet blue I’ve been in some form of
the sex industry for quite a long time
now and I started off being a fine art
nude model and then ended up very very
fastly getting into fetish modeling and
then I moved on to webcaming which I
thought was hilarious
and then from that I moved on to sugar
babying and that has a lot of elements
of escorting within it anyway so it was
kind of almost a natural progression for
um for me I prefer sex worker because it
encompasses a whole range of work like I
was talking about before I also for me
show solidarity for people who are
performing any type of sex work whether
that’s just talking dirty on the sex
lane or down to fetish models that show
they’re stalking legs so they’re not
doing anything explicitly sexual but it
falls into that category from your words
at word at the end of the day and if you
want to call me a slut that’s fine if
you want to call me you know a potato
that is fine so it’s kind of cool thing
it’s coming back into vogue that you can
just be like yeah so same to earlier I
wanted a dress that looked a bit slutty
but not too slutty and that’s fine I
think it’s kind of playful is coming
into sort of replacing the word sort of
sexy but yes it’s a problematic word my
family doesn’t know on the whole my mum
knows that I do nude modeling and that
petrifies her enough my family come from
very religious backgrounds obviously
with doing this video it’s always of a
concern that my family finds out by this
way but then this day I’m not ashamed of
this work I’m just scared I’m scared of
the reaction that I would get from my
family also I don’t want to hurt or
upset them because they may have those
opinions the sex workers need to be
saved or sex workers are dirty or sex
workers this issues there and I know a
point but some of my family that I would
want to put them through the possibility
of up saying them which is something I
have to deal with maybe a later date
I think it’s a lot of disassociation
occurs for me I know other people deal
with it and completely and utterly
different ways but for me there’s a law
of dissociation and you I’ve learned
over the years you can’t keep pushing
that down and down this is the part of
the reason I’m very picky with my
clients because there’s an for me there
is not enough money in the universe to
tolerate someone that is disgusting your
behavior towards you has views they’re
incredibly wearing or the challenges my
mental health on the long term
you’re with them not because you chose
them for their personality or good looks
you with them because you notice what
their bank balance was which is a really
strange way to enter into any
relationship and it’s more of a business
contract I feel it’s my job to act happy
friendly presentable because that’s why
you’re getting a monthly allowance they
don’t really come to you to be an actual
girlfriend they don’t want to hear about
how your period was really sore last
week or that you’re feeling really crap
or they’re actually your overdraft went
over this month because you had to pay
for your phone bills so that you could
bring him live night before they don’t
want to hear about that so it’s a fine
line between a proper relationship and a
working business relationship
I think that’s another misconception
about sex workers that you know
everyone’s very very straight amount of
sex workers particularly in Australia
I’ve met they’re very queer or actually
gay I may just have sex with guys
because it doesn’t really bother them I
actually know what a trans person back
in Scotland who is a sugar baby
who is in their own words sissies up
every weekend because they’re female to
male transitioning they haven’t had any
of the OP they look like an incredibly
beautiful girl or actually dude
so they’re using sugar daddies to pay
for their really expensive private sex
change which is one of the most
fantastic uses of gender fuckery
I’ve heard in quite some time
I wouldn’t have liked say my my set of
projects built up I don’t see myself as
just walking away from sex work